I figured it might be time for a new fashion post. There’s been lots of activity it the attire department recently, so let’s get cracking. And before anyone tries telling me that fashion isn’t important, Chris Jericho says otherwise:

See? Everyone care about style.

Let’s start with our NXT rookies. Last time, Justin Gabriel was sporting a Cheryl Cole inspired dress. The following week he decided to wear a lady’s stocking garter. I’m pleased to report that he has now learnt a few lessons in how to be  boy and has taken to going for the tried and tested hacked-up t-shirt & trunks combo:

But we are to expect a few more very special fashion moments from our favourite South African rookie. In a former life he was a model and entered himself into several fitness-model competitions. Here her is competing in the Mr. Fitness contest:

You can leeeeave your hat onnnnn! Bah-bah-bam.

Not all of the NXT rookies are quite as fashion-conscious as Mr. Gabriel though. Wrestlegasm’s newest crush, Daniel Bryan, could do with a little help. He was seen strolling down the ramp behind The Miz at Smackdown with half his shirt tucked in and half hanging out.

He looks like a teenage boy just stepped off the bus in his messy school uniform. Now, Daniel Bryan is one of the coolest people I have ever set eyes on. So cool, in fact, that if he called this look a fashion statement, people would want to copy it. Daniel Bryan’s not that bothered about fashion though, so maybe he just needs an enthusiastic lady in his life. A lady who enjoys fashion, maybe. Someone just to hang around backstage and help him decide whether his shirt looks better tucked in or left out, rather than choosing both at the same time. Just send me a Twitter DM, Daniel, and I’ll be there on Tuesday for week six of NXT.

From rookies to legends; Shawn Michaels has been worrying me lately. Since deciding he needed to leave DX behind and go it alone in the run-up to Wrestlemania, he’s had to make his own fashion choices in the absence of all that DX merchandise. It started with this monstrosity of a shirt:

Then, after wearing a grey blouse with some seemingly irrelevant pencil-drawn arrows on it ….

….HBK returned to the hunting theme in a half-camouflage half-fleece waistcoat and jeans. Nothing says “I’m going to kick you’re arse, Undertaker” more than sleeveless fleece. Yum.

But by the time this week’s Raw appeared on our screens, the expert salespeople at WWEShop had marched down to the arena to force Shawn into one of his own t-shirts.


However tragic HBK’s shirts are though, they can’t possibly be as bad as the Ed Hardy Special that R-Truth modeled on this week’s Raw.

Enough of all this negativity. Anyone would think that wrestlers don’t know how to dress. Look at one of our favourite ladies, Beth Phoenix, getting all glammed up to request a match from Vickie Guerrero.

Looking rather sexy there, young lady. We in The Bunker wholeheartedly approve.

Staying with the well-dressed, I’ve been quite taken with Christian’s clobber lately. Sure, The Miz usually gets my fashion pulse racing (JUST my fashion pulse) but I dig Christian’s smart-casual style. Here he is in my favourite recent outfit:

He’s even been seen in a most fashionable plaid shirt this week, and plaid shirts are usually reserved for Edge only.

We love a good plaid shirt in the Cardiff Wrestle Bunker. Our staff uniform is especially casual. Sidekick Andrew is wearing one in his current Twitter profile pic and I’m wearing one today. Useless fact: I wore this particular shirt three times before I realised it said….

…..in tiny letters in a small corner on the right side. My clothes give great life advice!  The Dean of Wrestlegasm, Matt Striker, isn’t too keen on this new element to the staff uniform. I’ve told him that if he can’t bring himself to wear a plaid shirt he can just wear jeans and a t-shirt. This isn’t quite what I had in mind.


Speaking of sharp dressers, there have been a couple of snappy suits on display this week, and on boys who don’t usually go in for the formal look too. Jack Swagger was eyeing up the Money in the Bank competition on Raw:

While John Cena was being a total pro and earning the boss a few more PPV buys on Jimmy Fallon:

We’ll switch to the ladies and, more specifically, Team LayCool. Their efforts to appear Simply Flawless have not gone unnoticed. They’ve even gone so far as to have custom tan pleather tops made to match their boots:

Vickie Guerrero’s efforts, however, weren’t so well received:

There does seem to be an obvious merchandise opportunity staring WWEShop in the face here. Alright, so most of us aren’t going to buy pleather tops. But the vests and t-shirts would go down a storm.

I’m not sure why they haven’t been made available for purchase yet. Maybe it’s because Team LayCool are a heel team and they think their merchandise won’t sell. But I know for a fact that women would buy them. One of the first things I wrote about on this blog was the lack of Diva merchandise and the lack of merchandise for women in general. Come on, WWEShop! You like making money and we have money to spend. Make this  happen!

So as not to finish on a serious note, I’ll end with one of my other favourite NXT rookies – Skip Sheffield. I had no idea I’d like the Cornfed Meatheat this much, but his pairing with William Regal has been a comedy match made in heaven. His finest fashion moment so far came on this week’s NXT when he used his arse to dub himself:

Ahhhh! There’s nothing like a confident backside to brighten one’s day.


First off, some sad news. I’m afraid Crotch Watch is now officially gone. I know you were all hoping I’d change my mind, but I’ve flipped the switch on the life support machine and have bid my tearful farewells. Don’t worry, it didn’t feel a thing. Here’s the kicker though; as well as inspecting the groins of wrestlers a little more closely than I should have, I also used CW as a platform to discuss wrestle-fashions. I kind of miss that part, so I’ve given birth to strut, pose, turn. Not only are some of our more established heroes making some…. ‘interesting’ fashion choices at the moment, but the new string of NXT rookies are also a bizarre crew of fashion triumphs and disasters. Seriously, Justin Gabriel, what were you thinking?

PS---> Lookin' smooth this week, Striker. See you at the weekend. Mwah!

I’ve never been to South Africa, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t standard dress on the streets of Cape Town. Still, you have to admire a man who would not only wear a white dress on global television, but a white dress that makes him look like a bit of a bloater. I can’t help but feel I’ve seen something similar before though. Maybe Justin took inspiration from a certain Newcastle lass.

Anyway, I’ll probably mix things up and include lots of different people in future posts. I may even have to include a few trunk inspections. Shutup! If they’re clothing, they’re fashion. For this first post though, I want to concentrate on the man who appears in the segment banner. Yes, everyone’s favourite bearded bad-guy, Dave Batista.

When he was a face, I can’t remember taking much notice of Dave’s threads. But as a heel, he’s been fashion roadkill week-after-week. In my role as chief mickey-taker, I feel  it’s my duty to drive back down that road and scrape up those festering clothing carcases with a shovel.

The first indication that things might be going awry for Dave came back in December at the Slammys.

I actually loved this outfit. Real men wear pink and all that. And besides, he was taking Maria’s Diva of the Year moment a la Kanye West/Taylor Swift at the VMAs. No problem.

But Dave obviously got a taste for the golf-shirt lifestyle and decided to carry it on a little longer.

It didn’t end there. In pure nouveau-riche style, he appeared on the Raw titantron to address John Cena in his Ralph Lauren Polo. LOGO TO THE MAX! Oh and the aviators were a must to top-off the look. Not sure how much you paid for those, David, but they sell them in TopShop for about 15 quid. Just sayin’.

From here, Dave decided to take a different clothing route. In one foul swoop he went from fair-weather golfer to King of Double-Denim. There are ways to wear double-denim and still look cool. For example, Christina Ricci looks pretty laid back and chilled in hers:

Captain of all Teenage Hearts, Zac Efron, pulls it off regularly:

Eternally stylish David Beckham makes it look effortless:

And then there’s fabulous Dave Batista; shirtless, bulging and with the style savvy of a South-Western trucker.

Oh Dave. Couldn’t you at least have put a shirt on, sweets? Ah. Of course not, because then we wouldn’t have seen that oiled, rippling, 6-pack, right?

But this wasn’t the end. Batista’s finest fashion hour came on this week’s Raw when he rolled in looking like the 80’s gay scene had just vomited him up.

That studded leather cuff alone is criminal, but the whole ensemble is both amazing and atrocious at the same time. I can’t even look at that picture without imagining him disappearing behind the curtain and throwing shapes to some wicked David Guetta beats. Click play, close your eyes and imagine it:

I’m tempted to suggest that someone in the wardrobe department has a word in Dave’s ear, but the anticipation of which combination of gaudy designer names, pleather waistcoats and fur-collared denim he might come up with next is kind of exciting. Keep on truckin’, David Batista. I bloody love you!