smackdown(lite): cash vs pop

I found it difficult to concentrate on this week’s Smackdown. Mainly because on Monday night (tomorrow)  I’ll be in the company of pretty much everyone on the Smackdown roster. (AAAARGH!) And I had a bad day on Friday. But you don’t care about that. Anyway, I’ll do my best. But you’ll have to excuse any sudden squeals and screams. I’m in training.

Undertaker got things started, with a bit of promo in the ring. Ode to colour co-ordination, Chris Jericho, had heard enough of Taker’s speech and came out to reveal some shocking news.

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But he has got mortician standard make-up.

They had a bit of a tussle and Taker kicked Jericho out of the ring.

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Providence loves Jericho.

Not that I want Jim Ross to be all sickly for too long, but I was a bit chuffed to see Matt Striker back at the Smackdown announce table. *HEART*

So, the first match was Dolph Ziggler, DH Smith and Tyson Kidd against John Morrison and Cryme Tyme. Striker said he enjoyed listening to Dolph Ziggler rant about how great he is. Todd Grisham suggested he would be the only one. No, I like Ziggler too, Todd Grisham. Then Matt Striker said he didn’t get along with guys like Cryme Tyme in high school. Grisham suggested that would be because Striker isn’t cool.

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The match was pretty good and full of action, as you might expect from this crew. Striker’s first musical reference of the week came in the form of Whitney Houston’s I’m Every Woman. Classic. Grisham felt upstaged again and made a movie reference. Stop it, Todd Grisham.

Now, the trauma of falling out with Batista has really taken its toll on Rey Mysterio. Josh Matthews, who was fully dressed this time, played counsellor and tried to get to the bottom of his troubles. As my Spanish is a bit dodgy, I’m not sure what the first part was all about. But he did say ‘amigo’ and ‘familia’ so I think you get the general gist.  Josh asked Rey to send a message to Batista, and it was heavy, because he pulled open his chin strap.

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He then went on to say that, basically, if they couldn’t resolve it amicably, he’d beat the answers out of Batista.

From there went to a ladies’ match. Apparently, people are still unconvinced that Beth Phoenix is a badass chick, so they brought another unknown in to make her look like a monster. Is this really necessary?

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We knooooooow

Drew McIntyre’s ever changing ring clobber was a disappointment this week. Gone was the flag emblazoned dress, in was a new dress, which appeared to be made from his granny’s shower curtain. I wonder what he’ll be wearing next week when he’s on home turf. (Eeeeeek!)

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This week Drew was taking Jimmy Wang Yang on. As usual, Drew demolished him before things go started. But wait. What’s this? Jimmy’s waited way too long for some TV time to give up without a fight. He climbed back into the ring  and the match actually started. Jimmy was amazing and……. no, ok. He was killed for the second time. But well done for having a go, sweets.

Rey Mysterio had a match against Mike Knox, which was surprisingly good for a Mike Knox match. Maybe I allow my fear of him to cloud my judgement. Can you imagine? I mean, it’s not like I favour the wrestler who make my pants happy or anything. Despite giving it a good go……

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…Rey managed to take Knox out with a 619 and a jump from the top rope.

CM Punk has seemed a bit lost since Bragging Rights. Thankfully, we’ll be sharing the same oxygen tomorrow night so I should be able to set him straight. (AAAARGH!) He has managed to grab himself a new catchphrase in the last couple of weeks, albeit a borrowed one.

Punk was up against R-Truth, who he found to be wholly unimpressive.

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I think you'll find that's a human race thing, not a straight edge thing.

This, according to Striker, was Johnny Cash vs Suge Knight. I have no words to explain how cool the idea of Punk as Johnny Cash is. But then Striker went on to call Punk Smackdown’s Iggy Pop. What?

jcashnipop

It was good to finally see R-Truth in a decent match instead of being punched out by Drew McIntyre before the bell has even been dinged. In a total shocker (natch), the referee interfered with the match and allowed R-Truth to take it. It may help to tell you that the referee was Scott Armstrong.

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Need some help there?

Back-room bullies Michelle McCool and Layla were trying to persuade lovely Mickie James that she should hit the road and never come back. Mickie was having none of it and issued them both with a statement of intent. The intent being that she was going to kick both their sorry behinds. She also referred to Layla as Scary Spice. A slight misstep there, Mickie. If you were looking to compare Layla to a sour-faced Spice Girl, I would have gone down this route.

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Rey Mysterio got to show what a great face he is by beating Mike Knox. It was only fair that Batista got to be even more the angry heel by taking on Twitter addict, Matt Hardy. Matt Hardy won the match by DQ, but Batista lost his marbles and continued to batter Hardy until he could hardly string a sentence together. You dayum right, Todd Grisham.

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Booooo! I’ll tell him off tomorrow night. YAAAAAAY!

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10 thoughts on “smackdown(lite): cash vs pop

  1. I think with Beth they’re going to do a sort fo Kong thing – she’ll kill all these locals, but then there’ll be one that beats her, and she’ll be the new Diva every one loves. Though I would like to see a Beth face turn.
    Tomorroooooooooow I’ll be in the same room as Triple, Cena and Randy 😛

    • Yeah, I get what they’re going for. Just seems a bit of a waste of time. I’m DYING for some proper, in-depth, female storylines. And they’ve got all the tools they need for that right now. Anyway, the next couple of days will be epic. For both of us. *high-5*

  2. Well, I care about what got you down on Friday Ray 🙂

    I am just glad they aren’t having Mickie James try to do commentary… she is a good in interstitial stuff, but wow, her guest commentaries were brutal.

    I wonder if next year we are going to see Sheamus vs McIntyre in battle against each other.

    • Yeah, but blogging my tales of woe on a wrestling blog wouldn’t go down very well, would it?

      I would LOOOOVE to see Sheamus vs McIntyre. But who would turn face? Probably Drew. He’s more personable than Sheamus. Put the call in to WWE HQ and make it happen for me. Ta.

  3. Ray said “first musical reference of the week came in the form of Whitney Houston’s I’m Every Woman. Classic.”

    Tom says: You could call it “classic striker”, but if i found my self sounding like michael cole, i’d need to say “oh my” just before I take my own life!

    Ray said “Josh asked Rey to send a message to Batista, and it was heavy, because he pulled open his chin strap”

    Tom says: yes, young mysterio is a master of theatrical devices! What, only last week he was able to display his earnesty (or is that earnest -ness?) by using “dog” a lot during his promo. Bravo reymondo!

    Ray said: “Jimmy was amazing and……. no, ok. He was killed for the second time.”

    Tom says: You could say that Drew ripped him a “third one”!

    Ray said: “I favour the wrestler who make my pants happy”

    Tom says: hmm, in shock, did you really say that? EEEKS!

    Ray said: ” have no words to explain how cool the idea of Punk as Johnny Cash is.”

    Tom says: Indeed, Johnny Cash, that infamous straight edge legend 😀

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